const disasterMetrics = {
  hope_phase: {
    budget: 5000,
    reality: "Unlimited potential, zero users",
    mood: "Unshakeable optimism",
    mistakes: ["Hiring my cousin as CTO", "Premium Slack for 1 person"]
  },
  
  growth_phase: {
    budget: 8000, 
    reality: "Scaling nothing successfully",
    mood: "Aggressive denial",
    mistakes: ["Facebook ads to reach 'visionaries'", "Business cards with QR codes"]
  },
  
  panic_phase: {
    budget: 4000,
    reality: "Throwing money at existential problems",
    mood: "Manic pivoting",
    mistakes: ["Rebranding 3 times in 2 weeks", "Hiring a consultant to find customers"]
  },
  
  acceptance_phase: {
    budget: 0,
    reality: "Peace through spreadsheet meditation",
    mood: "Zen-like clarity",
    mistakes: ["None. This is where wisdom begins."]
  }
};

import pandas as pd
import numpy as np
from emotions import EntrepreneurialTrauma

# Categorize your beautiful disaster by emotional tax brackets
emotional_spend_analysis = {
    'rage_purchases': {
        'amount': 2400,
        'examples': ['Premium Canva Pro for "professional" memes',
                    'Expensive coffee to fuel late-night pivots'],
        'tax_category': 'Business Operating Expenses',
        'therapy_value': 'Priceless'
    },
    
    'hope_investments': {
        'amount': 3200,
        'examples': ['Google Ads that got 2 clicks from your mom',
                    'Conference tickets to "network with thought leaders"'],
        'tax_category': 'Marketing & Advertising',
        'therapy_value': 'Character building'
    },
    
    'denial_costs': {
        'amount': 1800,
        'examples': ['Third logo redesign "to capture the vision better"',
                    'Business coach who asked more questions than provided answers'],
        'tax_category': 'Professional Development',
        'therapy_value': 'Expensive self-awareness'
    },
    
    'bargaining_budget': {
        'amount': 900,
        'examples': ['Last-ditch pivot to "AI for dogs"',
                    'Domain names for 7 different business ideas'],
        'tax_category': 'Research & Development',
        'therapy_value': 'Lessons in letting go'
    }
}

# Calculate your Failure-to-Wisdom Conversion Rate
total_spend = sum(item['amount'] for item in emotional_spend_analysis.values())
wisdom_multiplier = calculate_story_value(total_spend, emotional_damage=True)

print(f"Total Investment in Character Development: ${total_spend:,}")
print(f"Estimated Story Value: ${total_spend * wisdom_multiplier:,}")

-- The relational model of beautiful disasters
CREATE TABLE startup_corpses (
    id UUID PRIMARY KEY,
    startup_name VARCHAR(255) NOT NULL,
    death_date DATE NOT NULL,
    cause_of_death TEXT,
    total_burn_rate DECIMAL(10,2),
    emotional_damage_score INTEGER CHECK (emotional_damage_score >= 1 AND emotional_damage_score <= 10),
    tax_write_off_potential DECIMAL(10,2),
    story_monetization_value DECIMAL(10,2),
    resurrection_date DATE, -- For the phoenix phase
    lessons_learned JSONB,
    created_at TIMESTAMP DEFAULT NOW()
);

-- Index for fast failure lookups
CREATE INDEX idx_startup_death_date ON startup_corpses(death_date);
CREATE INDEX idx_burn_rate ON startup_corpses(total_burn_rate);

startup_obituary:
  name: "Revolutionary AI-Powered Synergy Solutions"
  born: "2024-03-15"  # The day hope died
  died: "2024-11-30"  # The day wisdom was born
  age_in_days: 260
  
financial_forensics:
  total_investment: 17000
  revenue_generated: 47.23  # Two Gumroad sales to friends
  customer_count: 0  # Not counting your mom
  mvp_completion: "73% (the remaining 27% was the hard part)"
  
emotional_metrics:
  tears_shed: "Immeasurable"
  relationships_strained: 3
  family_dinners_avoided: 7
  self_help_books_purchased: 12
  inspirational_podcasts_binged: 47
  
tax_implications:
  business_losses: 16952.77
  equipment_depreciation: 3200
  education_expenses: 1800  # Expensive lessons count
  therapy_costs: 2400  # Business-related emotional maintenance
  
content_opportunities:
  blog_posts_potential: 25
  youtube_videos_possible: 12
  twitter_threads_brewing: 156
  linkedin_humblebrags_ready: 8
  tiktok_dance_interpretations: 1  # "The Startup Death Spiral"

{
  "failureFunnel": {
    "ideation": {
      "stage": "Blessed Ignorance",
      "confidence": "100%",
      "competence": "3%",
      "excitement": "Explosive",
      "months_duration": 1
    },
    "building": {
      "stage": "Productive Delusion",
      "confidence": "95%",
      "competence": "15%",
      "excitement": "Manic",
      "months_duration": 4
    },
    "launching": {
      "stage": "Reality Check Incoming",
      "confidence": "70%",
      "competence": "45%",
      "excitement": "Nervous",
      "months_duration": 2
    },
    "crickets": {
      "stage": "Market Education Phase",
      "confidence": "40%",
      "competence": "65%",
      "excitement": "Declining",
      "months_duration": 3
    },
    "acceptance": {
      "stage": "Entrepreneurial Enlightenment",
      "confidence": "200% (in next thing)",
      "competence": "85%",
      "excitement": "Strategic",
      "months_duration": "Ongoing"
    }
  },
  "lessonsTaxable": [
    "Market validation isn't asking your friends if they'd use it",
    "Building something people want > building something cool",
    "Revenue cures all startup diseases (except stupidity)",
    "Your idea is worth $0. Your execution might be worth something.",
    "Failure is expensive, but ignorance costs more"
  ]
}